YOUR PLAN MAY NOT BE GOD’S PLAN.
That brings me to today. The strip mall has only one tenant, Hotstepper.net, an online shopping store my wife Jenny and I own, and decided to expand into a brick and mortar store. My thinking was simple, put in my own store to get the ball rolling for the building. Hotstepper.net would generate revenue in the form of rent for the building, and also show some activity to help bring in more tenants. That never materialized.
Today (Nov. 8, 2008) the nation is in one of the worst recessions in decades, and on top of that there is a major credit crunch under way. Our construction loan ran out in April of this year (2008), and the bank wants to know how we are going to pay up. Hotstepper.net is closed; the store could not even afford to pay the $140,000 loan payment I got to open the store, let alone rent to the building.
So here I am with a house I leveraged to the top that I am now upside-down in, a strip mall with no tenet’s, and a closed store that still has a loan to the bank. On top of that Jenny and I have basically been living on credit cards hoping something would change.
Even if I worked 60 hours a week as a concrete finisher it would not come close to paying all the bills.
You now have a basic idea of what’s going on in my life and in my head. I do believe God has a plan for all of us. Maybe that plan takes some time to figure out, and first you need to go through some of life’s up’s and down’s. If you never experience life’s disappointments, how can you really begin to help someone else? Everything in life can be looked at in many different ways, and its how you choose to see your life that makes the difference in what you will do in the future. So I am trying to look at my life as one big learning experience. I know there are people out there that would say I am just justifying my failure, and maybe to an extent their right. But I am going to continue writing through this experience for two basic reasons.
First; to help reinforce my belief that God does have something better planned for me.
Second; to try and understand these feelings better so maybe I can help someone else.
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